Sunday, April 6, 2008

Woman Needs MJ to Lift Restraining Order for Third Paternity Test

Lisa Miceli wants a judge to lift a temporary restraining order.

You see, she wants Michael Jordan to take a paternity test. Unfortunately for her, a judge imposed a restraining order on her after MJ filed a harassment suit.

Oh, and this might be as equally unfortunate for Miceli: Jordan took two paternity tests in 2005. Both tests proved he is not the father of her now 4-year-old son. Nonetheless, Miceli lives in a false-reality and claims the restraining order prevents her from negotiating the child-support agreement with Jordan, a deal her gold-digging-self (oh, and her son) rightfully deserve.

Jordan's attorney Frederick J. Sperling might just have to dash her hopes. "There is not going to be a settlement," Sperling told the judge. "Mr. Jordan is not the father of her child, and we're not going to engage in any discussions on that."

Ms. Miceli: please resign to the fact that your son was not fathered by MJ, but by the next-Jordan, Harold Minor.

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About the Undrafted Free Agent

Ron Crimson was the only player on the high school roster to not get in a game. He couldn't argue with the decision, because he sucked. Needless to say, yet stated anyway, when he entered the NBA draft following his sophomore season in college, he went undrafted. Now, Ron Crimson is the Undrafted Free Agent.

Contact the Undrafted Free Agent

Interested in informing the Undrafted Free Agent of his mistakes, advertisement opportunities, or a scoop on the latest sports scandal? (You can guess which is more likely.) Well, email him at undraftedfreeagent [at] gmail.com.

Look at This!

There's nothing here; I just needed to fill some space. Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! Space eater! I also needed to balance it out a bit.

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